Size Matters!: 21 Truths You Should Know to Enjoy a Lifetime of Effortless Success.

Dr. Paris is the author of a book, "Size Matters" that also contains 21 other truths one should know to enjoy a lifetime of "Effortless Success." Her innov-.
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Reward your loving self and stop punishing yourself for negative thoughts your mind creates. Recognize the behaviors you have programmed into you as a result of fears created by your mind. Let go of those behaviors and let your loving heart — the true you before all the bullshit, be the one that participates in and enjoys life and is the one everyone gets to know.

I like how anyone who disagrees with you gets deleted. I admire those who question a lot and I ado believe in the word of Buddha: Do not believe in anything simply because it is spoken and rumored by many. Do not believe in anything simply because it is found written in your religious books. Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders.

Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it. From personal experience — I believe suicide is a call from the spirit world when are ego is not happy with the matierial world.

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My mental illness grew from delusions of grandeur I my ego spent years cultivating. I do believe the spirits help us on this plane when we are open to the next demension. The Course of Miracles is a great way to see with Love rather than the illlusions of fear. Love is in the air — breathe! I can be a tad bit cynical. This is like all those people running around trying to get into heaven.

I now have a huge piece I can make for my office wall! I think I need to copy this and carry it around with me so I can read it daily. This is just what I needed today! Great article, thank you so much. I recently got out of a relationship and a LOT of the above listed were present in the relationship. It hurts right now very much but I know it was for the best. I see in the post s that there are others out there that are working on finding a happier place, much as i myself am.

I would like to suggest that those of us with problems with any of the above should sit and contemplate how these affect us and how each of us as individuals can make them work for ourselves rather than pick them apart and try and make a bad situation out of a well meant and helpful posting. The author is not perfect and would probably not claim to be, merely trying to help there fellow travelers down this often confusing road that we call life. Thank you Lucius for putting into words exactly what I would tell others.

After self medicating for 15yrs. I knew I needed help. Been on meds never abused them , and in Therapy off and on for almost 30 yrs. I could not count the times I wished, prayed, I was physically ill with something instead of my mental illnesses. I am still a Christian, and know someday I will get answers for this.

I know God heals. I have seen miricles. Just not my time. I also know God did not cause the abuse to happen to me, it was a choice of my parents to do what was done. I know others have been through worse. I left church 3yrs. I know I have to forgive, to be forgiven. God help me as You have all my life. You are not alone. But do seek help. I have seen it work for others. Each afirmation makes it that bit closer. Thank you for post such a wonderful blog.

Keep up the great writing! And thanks to this article I can add to my list. Thank You for this article, Purpose Fairy. I remember a few years back when I was just as how you described. Somewhere during that time probably because of my stressful job , I lost my way and became a lot more bitter and upset than usual. A lot of these action steps will help me better myself and bring out the old side of me again and help move forward with my life. Great list, and awesome insight. Some I have been able to let go, but others are still a challenge.

What a great list. I have been working on many of these, and your list brings a few others to mind. I will print this out and put it somewhere I will see it frequently. The loss of a pet is a reason to grieve and to mourn. And, believe it or not, it is also okay to laugh when you hear that someone you loved passed on. Use one suggestion to live into another:. Give up your attachments that say Death is a Negative.

Give up living up to expectation, it says. Give up on the fact that trauma defines who you are. It does not suggest these are easy tasks! They apply to the Big Stuff, too. Be challenged by what you read here; if you need a blog to tell you to stop complaining, and blaming other people, so be it, but that is not what it was written for. But the sooner one is willing to face the past giving it up would be to reject the experiences that formed you, which would leave you without a reference point — why would we want that? Give up on your fears. Fear is not an illusion.

If we create it, then it exists. Thank you Lucius for your clarity, it has been insightful-dealing with lost friendships… Purpose fairy is a wonderfully appropriate name, god bless. Lucius, I absolutely agree to you response. Also, Chrisfer, I, too was hurt when I read comment When someone has a mental illness, they still strive to better themselves.

Many mental illnesses can be treated with medication. Having said that, I must add that when a mental illness is made stable through medication, that person who suffers from it oftentimes wants to feel normal. An article such as this would then target them as an audience just as much as a person who is not mentally ill.

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Danaadmin, please do not exclude people that suffer from a mental illness. You cannot possibly understand them unless you have been in their situation. Otherwise, keep writing uplifting articles. Just remember to carefully word your responses to the resonses. There is a few I have to work on. Because of our talk, I thankfully have given up quite a bit. I relied on others for information. NOW I have the only one in me heart to go to and who is the chief healer. I, as we all should be going to the Lord forever.

In the world we look at so many different views and have not only our habits, but seem to take on others. Previous therapy sessions never touched me as deeply as this piece just did. Although everyone could benefit, this should be required reading for ACoA. Since I doubt anyone is going to disagree with you, while I agree with most of these some of these are not only counter-intuitive but are also anti-motivational and simply put, horrible advice.

Also engaging in short term things that make you happy will have long term consequences. Give up the need for Control: Yes you might be happy shoving your face with ice cream, but ultimately this lack of personal control will lead to obesity and sadness. If the government is doing something that is going to destroy your life, again complain. There is a certain amount of complaining that is necessary otherwise you will become apathetic.

Give up your need to impress others: There is nothing wrong with going the extra mile because you know it will impress people. Putting in more time in the office, or spending more time at gym. While these things might remove short-term happiness they can give you greater long term happiness. This should be available in a large poster format. It would be a perfect constant reminder plastered on my office wall.

This post does an excellent job of speaking to all people who, at one time or another, have experienced and can relate to all fifteen items it addresses. I think for people who have been diagnosed with having a mental illness, continuing to communicate with a professional is a helpful solution and should be continued. However, if you think that this post does not relate to you then you are mistaken. To think that your illness will not allow you to act on these lessons as they are presented is a falsehood.

I have been depressed and suicidal myself. I have experienced the transformation first hand of rising out of the darkness into light. For others in dark places or have had a doctor tell them that they have a chemical imbalance that causes them to act a certain way, it is never too late to change your brain. The human brain is elastic and it can be changed. It can be changed into something entirely different through training and practice.

Never give up on hope and never limit yourself or deny your ability to becoming a positive, happy person. With the exception of severe trauma or a physical impairment within the brain, the only limitations in life are self-inflicted. Our minds can just as easily think positively as it can think negatively. Considering this, the satisfaction of life depends solely on the choices that an individual chooses to make and how they react to those choices.

Be well and choose to see life as it is and nothing more. Live simply, slowly and always be aware and observing of the environment. I read this whole article today, and I am so glad that I did. I have lost who I am, and what it is I enjoy, besides being a Mom, I really have no other joy in my life. My life has almost always been about doing for others…….. I have always thought that it was a selfish act to think only about what I want and enjoy. My life has taken many, many directions in my 51 years and it is hard to stay on the path that takes me where I need to be. Old habits are very hard to break.

I literally make myself sick over what to do to change this mindset. I am ever so gratefull for the person that sent this to me right now am dealing with a lot of stuff that was mentioned here ,this has open up a new way of thinking for me ,am happy that i took the time to read it through ,i plan on reading this everyday until i come to the place that am suppose to be at ,thank you honey thank you…..

I will take a mental note of what happened and why, learn from it and move on. I cant just put myself first and be true to myself. I cant, there is too much pain in this world. To Lucius, I was happy to see your thoughtful and eloquent response. I have been dealing with depression all my life and have been diagnosed since the age of It took me many years to understand why I was often moved by something but unable to apply the principles that impressed me in my life.

It finally dawned on me that I had a unique problem: I could have saved myself years of frustration. What I needed to be reading was works by wise people like you: Is this what poor people do to pass the time? Happiness is life without worry, without concern over serious problems, and the only thing that fixes that is money. Literally all these issues are alleviated if you have enough money.

Luminita D. Saviuc

I would add just one more to this list. And that is to remove the word hate from your mind. If there is no hate then only true love can exsist. I think 5 is best expressed by Jedi Master Yoda: Do… or do not. There is no try. These are interesting and philosophically curious. There is a fine line between spinelessness or indifference and blissfulness. This line is not absense but presense, which often takes a great deal of control—self-control not control of others. But, what do I know. I am facing my second divorce and have spent much of my life soul searching.

This is a fabulous post! Such wonderful, productive and doable thoughts about letting go. Might I add, Everyone of these points is golden. If your on the edge of understanding this of want to work this into your life start teaching it. After letting go of the need to control and omnipotence. Giving to others is the way to get back. I always danced to the beat of a different drum. People found me to be weird as a child, but from what I read I was ahead of my time. I am happy with who and what I am. Self-love goes a long way in acceptance. It is hard to teach and even harder to find within yourself.

I do not need someone to complete me. I am happy being by myself but do a lot of charity work for animals and children who have no voice. This article is absolutely beautiful! Like many other readers, I agree that it effectively encapsulates everything that is essential to living a happy life, thank you Purpose Fairy for this wonderful piece of work! Great to be positive and just as good to be realistic. As I am sure your post is meant to encourage, empower and enlighten. You are being unreal when you say situations cannot make us sad or depressed. I guess you have never lossed a loved one or was never struck with a serious illness.


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Even the Bible if you believe in it expects us to grieve. They can be helpful to many. This seems like a simplistic take on why our fears exist, and how they are valuable in doing transformational work. The thing you fear may be an illusion, but the fear is real, as is the pain associated with it. Such a perfect time to come across this post on Facebook. I will be sharing it with my friends. I am in the middle of a significant and difficult transition in my life which has left me looking for purpose. What better purpose than to focus on what really matters in life.

Great wisdom, tips and thanks for the sharing. May more people achieve happiness by letting go and giving up on what burdens us and stops us from choosing happiness. I love this list. Will indeed print and post, and share and read and re-read. Limiting beliefs can be turned into the catalysts for change, the power for action and the fuel to change from ordinary — to extraordinary; just as soon as you recognize, they are YOURS to do away with. Thanks for sharing your thoughts in this article. I found much of it to be intriguing, thought-provoking, and challenging.

As you look at expounding on these, you might remember there are those of us who look back at the past which confines us and defines us to a large extent and we only see things that we never want to repeat. Holding on to that past is the last thing we want to do, yet letting go is more painful than can be imagined. I think your scope of the people you wanted to attract with your list did not include people like me.

But today I will let go of any negative feelings about that just as soon as I acknowledge them. Trust me people, I have been following such advices and I can only tell you this much, be prepared to live a lonely and boring life when you start following things like: Although the message might seem right, but think about this: I agree that you should never listen to the entire world and try to be what they want you to be, but maybe your loved one wants you to stop lying, stop smoking, stop drinking too much etc.

These are the kind of things you should listen too because they are in YOUR best interest. Man is a social animal and no one wants to die alone. Use your judgement, keep on loving the people you love and little sacrifices to maintain your good relations go a long way in keeping you happier. Hi, great article, I stumbled on it on Pinterest.

These are all things I must work on. I find amazing quotes and pieces of literature that help me a lot but then I still have a mental breakdown some days. I send out an explosion of sadness and anger and by the end of it all I realize I really have nothing to be sad or angry about. By this point I feel there is no redeeming myself to my loved one and he is thinking I am psycho and it takes a week or so to get over the fact that…gee, what is going on with me?

Why do I act like this? And finally, after all this, I am upset at myself for the way I acted and I dwell on the matter of how dumb I acted. I hope I can learn from this article everyday and start to think before I open my mouth with nonsensical complaints and self loathing. I really need a change of mindset. Hopefully I am not the only one out there who feels like this sometimes. Everything in my life is great, I truly have no reason to complain, yet I still find things to be unhappy about. As much as this stuff does not bother me most of the time, other times it creeps up and really eats away at my thoughts.

This is going to be a learning process for me, as life is for everyone, but this is going to help a lot, I know it. I am confused as to what you mean about giving up attachment. You say to do this yet you do not elaborate on what you mean by giving up attachment nor do you offer suggestions on how to go about doing so. Just saying that providing some examples would have been a good place to start.

Its my personal opinion that this list is unrealistic without the love and purpose of God. If you give up both your attachments and your need for acceptance of people, you will feel extremely empty and alone. This list through scripture: Pride only breeds quarrels, but wisdom is found in those who take advice. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.

For you will be treated as you treat others. The standard you use in judging is the standard by which you will be judged. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Do all things without complaining and disputing, 15 that you may become blameless and harmless. Fearing people is a dangerous trap, but trusting the LORD means safety. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child.

When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge the other, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things. Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. For God has not given us a spirit of timidity, but of power and love and discipline.

Brethren, I do not regard myself as having laid hold of it yet but one thing I do: Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.

I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. I loved your article! I work on these things every day. The attachment part is tricky and giving up being right or not caring about others opinions of me. Thanks for your succinct presentation of these goals I carry with me daily! Thank you Chris, so very much for your 42 comment and Lucius — the most clearly presented way I feel. Thanks for helping me understand a bit about myself.

Reading peoples comment even makes me more happy.. Like I said,everybody wants happiness ofcourse-its the real meaning of life.. People just completely have forgotten.. Blinded by manipultion through hundreds ,if not thousands of years. I generally enjoyed the article and in so far as learning to let go of our attachments, it is very useful to understand the basic idea.

But I do take issue with this section:. In the last year, 3 people close to me have died, all too young. In my soul searching, these strong feelings came to me — grief, despair, sadness, and these are all healthy emotions in the wake of a death. I can choose my actions — I can choose how I react to my emotions.

And in my meditation I try to take the role of the observer, watching my emotions as they arise and letting them float by. But the idea that emotions only arise out of allowing — essentially out of a loss of control, goes against 2 there. By letting go of control, I let myself experience my emotions and consider my reactions to them.

After all, to be in a state of wise mind, I pair rational thought with emotion, and in that place all emotions are allowed. Thank you so much for this wonderful, sound advice. It is so simple, yet so profound. Mental hygiene can be helpful if We realize how complex life is and how important to give everything lots of room and a healthy dose of irreverence, humor and tolerance.

My partner says it boils down to 2 things: Dream big dreams and get out of the way! The idea that life will be fair. Stellar advice to those wanting to create their dreams come true and yet, are not, talk about useful action steps. I especially resonate with number five — limitations. I like to limit my limiting beliefs! You know, each one of your suggested steps leads into the next which makes for steady movement.

I have come out of a difficult relationship, in which I was manipulated and controlled. I have lost who I was. Perhaps though, it was something I needed to go through in order to discover a new me. I am suffering a great deal from all the above 15 things! And making other suffer too, and caused myself into somekind of depression. So true, but so tough to do it! All of the things listed in this post are situationally useful or good, and giving up on them entirely can turn someone into a carpet. I think that life is too complex for the recipe to happiness to hold in one small blog post.

And I think giving up on this constant need to be kind actually made a lot of people happier; it all comes down to making the right choice as to when to be kind. Not just letting go of blaming others! Fortunately, I gave up most of these things over the past few years and guess what? I think giving up on limiting beliefs was huge… followed by the need to always be right. I have got to make sure I am right before I say so and I pick my battles carefully now. Saves tons of wasted energy. Thanks for this article. I have been most of my life on a path of self-development — 42 years.

2. Body changes are natural

To Lucius, I agree that their are exceptions and I am so happy that you voiced them: Sorry to hear that you are not in the target audience anymore, though. I think 16 is going to have problems finding anyone in the target audience!! You make a good aspect. Has fantastic facts here. I really enjoyed your blog! I put it in my favorites so I can come back again. I found it on Bing. This will take me the rest of my life to complete!

I have one question — if it is OK to ask a fairy a question? Control as with everything in life is a very broad subject with many emotional overtones. I wonder if one can possibly tread the fine line of just right consciousness, no control and yet accepting responsibility. I even used a bit of control not much to write this question, to think and even to resist not writing to much.

Letting go of control does not imply to let go of your responsibilities, but rather to trust yourself, to trust life and to go with the flow, the current of life instead of going against it. The point about giving up criticism confuses me, though. A lot of times, if they are angry and frustrated, that is because that anger is already within themselves and they are projecting it on events and people. And I will have to quote Carl Jung here: Constructive criticism is always welcomed, of course.

You just have to observe where are they coming from, and go from there. You can choose to engage in a conversation with someone who is blatantly ignorant and feed their flame or you can realize that person is exactly what you do not want to be like and you can grow.

3. Give up on blame

The quote by Jung is spot on. Everything comes down to a choice. Reaction is always within your control. No one can tell you how to think. Be forever mindful and transform negative energy into positive energy. The article is not referring to normal grief, rather chronic unhappiness. Even in mourning there are opportunities to observe beauty and acknowledge that happiness can indeed be intersperced with grief as part of the process.

I think it might be a good idea to expand 13 — I need to give up the past, not because I long for it, but because I regret it. Many things about the past I regret also Chris. I can tell you, each day at least most days the past seems a little further away. I believe that it all comes down to acceptance.

They are as much part of us as all the good stuff we want. So the only way to deal with it is simply acceptance. How do I replace the complaining, the blame, the expectations with something that comes deeply from the heart? Love compassionately — this can only happen in the now and only then nothing else will matter.

Thanks Lucius for your insight. It is absolutely true. People should seek help when it comes to mental illness. It is a life long commitment to improve your daily living and deal with the emotion. By doing that you take charge of your life. Thank you, Lucius, for comment 14, which said exactly what I logged in to say.

And 13, which makes some excellent points as well. I guess that I am shallow and not as evolved as the rest of you. This article is the antithesis of my life. I really am doomed. This is a wonderful article and touches the right albeit difficult ways to keep oneself happy.

I am going to have to remind myself of these valuable lessons every day! Finally, to truly be happy, give up your desire to make lists on things to give up to be happy! This is overall a great list, and most of it is absolutely true. Nobody can make you unhappy, no situation can make you sad, miserable, depressed, mad, angry, etc.

More powerful and in control? It actually makes me very angry. And if you will put aside your likely indignation at being called out and listen, I will tell you why. A lot of people are mentally ill. Depression, bipolar disorders, anxiety disorders, PTSD, etc. People should indubitably try to find the good in every situation, should look for what they can learn, and people should be mindful of their feelings and where they come from.

Situations can make it worse, or trigger it, but sometimes it happens for absolutely no reason whatsoever. Nevertheless, we are TOLD to do this, just as if it is possible and will help. Putting it on a list of this kind is. Mental illness is akin to having a broken leg. Would you tell someone with a broken leg and no pain meds to stop complaining, look on the bright side, that you are only afraid and hurt because you are allowing yourself to be?

We just want people to understand that we have a right to our feelings, that they are real and legitimate and not to dismiss them because they are feelings that other people CAN dismiss. There is nothing wrong with being sad or hurt or angry. It almost killed me. Learn to express your feelings in a healthy fashion; even anger can be expressed in a healthy way, and does not have to be turned into something else.

Enlist their help if you can, but do not drive them away or hurt them if you can possibly avoid it. Be mindful of the feelings you have that come from within, from your disorder, and learn to tell them from feelings that come from things that are wrong in your life. Neither is wrong, both are real feelings that deserve respect, but you need to be able to tell the difference, because they demand different things of you. Things outside you demand action, a lot of the time. For the things outside you that you can fix or change, try to figure out how to do that and try to remain calm.

For the things outside you that you cannot change, try to limit the power they have over you when you are not having to deal with them right at that moment. For the things that come from within you, find a safe way to express them, and, without denying that you feel them, try to limit how much power you allow them over your actions.

If you can afford help, get it. Seek like-minded people online. That at least is comparatively cheap, and they will understand you better than anyone else will. Learn your limits and then learn to work within them, and THEN learn to push them when you are stable. Do what you can to make yourself feel better, express your needs to others as clearly and as precisely as you can, give yourself permission to screw up because you will do that occasionally, and at the beginning you will do it a lot, and when things are really bad, yes, buckle down and take it one day at a time.

Being open-minded and non-judgmental is helpful in reducing stress from interacting with the outside world. Be gentle with yourself. You really seem to be in the business of trying to do right by people on this site, and being helpful. You seem to encourage people to be accepting, tolerant, and thoughtful. You seem to encourage people to listen, rather than dictate. I agree with basically everything you said… HOWEVER, I think you are missing the fact that this article is not intended for the mentally ill nor for people who have recently experienced a trauma in their life, such as the death of a loved one.

Glad that less than half of the population is targeted here! Maybe you should do more research into how many are actually affected my ANY of the mental illnesses listed in the post you are replying to! Those individuals spend many, many, maany years trying to come back from years of the trauma suffered from people who think that the world is all made of bubbles and happy places! Surely self expression including negative experiences are healthy, however having suffered from severe depression which hospitalized me I can confidently comment that negativitity can absolutely be reframed and attitudes can changed positively through practice.

The exception being one suffers from a disease in which one is deemed legally insane. I have numerous self help books and years of counseling and did not really understand my depression as you expressed. You have made a difference to me. Really, really loved what you have to say here! Hit all the right marks. Just sorry there are so many others here that keep trying to push you around. Wish there was a little more tolerance for these illnesses, like there is in the world now for so many other things. I do appreciate your comment here, because I thought I was all alone when I was reading this.

I do not dismiss your perspective only hope to open alternative treatments for you. I used to randomly have a terrible time falling asleep, generally tied to mental stimulation or lack of physical activity. I read a book called dogzchen: I practiced saying ahhhhh in my head for a week or two while trying to fall asleep, and I can literally fall asleep at will by repeating this practice for 10 to 15, but no longer have to practice at night. The mind is an amazingly trainable thing, I would hope you look into meditaions, if you prefer to have a western boost you might look into the work of Robert Monroe.

His binaural stuff is expensive, but the books can be found at the library and you maybe able to reproduce it with open source binaural software. Good luck to you. Thank you for this very well written post. I learned quite a lot and every point you make is relevant. I loved your point about our feelings. I too believe you must acknowledge anger, sadness, etc. Anger is usually caused a mistake, whether yours or someone elses, and mistakes are how we learn. Giving up attachment is very important, else we become a slave to our possessions which robs us of quality time for ourselves and loved ones.

Who cares, if it works? Anthony, I sense you disapprove of the post. It appears you are not following This is very good! If people read and followed your advice, they would definitely be happier. The only part I disagree with is God says that He has not given us a spirit of fear but a spirit of power, of love, and of a sound mind. Thankful that a friend passed this on at a time it will help.

Danaadmin got it right with meditation. One needs to adhere to principles of human behavior and if not the drop out rate will plummet. By meditating, letting only positive thoughts in, letting go…. One will eventually find that peace and its never too late! Finding oneself to me goes back to my first wonderful memory in life as well as the others which put a big smile on my face. Love the Purpose Fairy! Someone important to me sent me the link to this post a while back.

Nevertheless, I will probably post this on my Facebook. You did a wonderful job and I appreciate that you took the time to write this. The Path to Happiness: I think that to go back to being you, it is crucial to know that you are not living your life, but the life of somebody else, and who you are in this very moment is not who you want to be, is not who you really are deep down inside. Put yourself first and commit yourself to being true to yourself, always and forever, commit yourself to always do all things in your own way, to always say what you think and feel.

Meditation is also a great way of getting in touch with who you really are, and will also give you a sense of inner peace, helping you to be more present in your life and everything you do. Infinite Love and Peace and good luck on your journey of self discovery, I am sure you will rediscover the real you! Find a small thing.

Start with something you used to like to do when you were a child. Pick out pretty pebbles from a stream. Find a new thing. What did you think you could never do when you were a kid? I wished there were Indians, real Indians, and that they would adopt me and teach me how to make arrowheads out of stone. When I was 30 years old, I went to a rock and mineral show with a friend and found people inside making arrowheads out of stone. Powerful moment—and I learned how to make arrowheads from stone, just like I wanted to when I was a child.

These are the places you begin … the person you were in the beginning is still in there and can lead you to the person you are now, and teach you how to move forward into the kind of person you wish to become. Thank you, Purpose Fairy, for reminding us those important actions! So bringing it into the light trough your post is very helpful! Would be nice if you encountered like minded people in your day-to-day living, otherwise it is such a struggle. Saviuc 30, May Happiness Most Popular. Five Steps To Becoming A Fully Functioning Person Carl Rogers, an influential American psychologist and one of the founders of the humanistic approach to psychology, described a healthy and fully- functioning […] Luminita D.

David 17, April at Patrick 16, April at 4: Marcella 16, April at T odd 15, April at 4: Noel 15, April at 2: Stop letting bullshit Internet pop. Marj Tolentino 15, April at 6: Thank you for posting this article. Krantzstone 15, April at 4: Gil Alan 15, April at 3: Michael 15, April at Anon 14, April at This is basically Buddhism. B 14, April at John Frederick Koshko 13, April at 5: D 13, April at 5: Ingrid 13, April at 2: Sherryl 13, April at 3: Terry 13, April at 2: But that is so hard to do.

Sean Dean 12, April at So, in summary, when you are dead, and able to give up these 15 things, you will be happy? Liz 12, April at Livia Tulis 12, April at Bernie 12, April at 5: Johnny 12, April at 5: Sarah Lawrence Hinson 12, April at 3: A great post written for the New Energy! Thanks and I love your site name too. Shall be sharing and coming back to read more. We fight our point and do not try to understand what others are saying. Anna 11, April at 6: It was just in time. Thank you so much! I am shifted right now. MindWarrior 11, April at 5: Its first when you realize that there is no rules when you can start to make progress.

Be the creator of your own reality! Yousef 16, April at Do you have a different point of view? I am interested in what you mean. Skeptic 11, April at 4: Randy 16, April at Chick Pritchard 11, April at Jimmy Pickett 11, April at Sage advice all contained in the 12 steps.

Mysticadvisor 11, April at Lynn 11, April at 7: Name klare 11, April at 5: John 11, April at 5: Thats the definition of a Hippie. Amera 11, April at 4: Thank you so much it really helped, much needed it tonight.. Jon 11, April at 4: Everyone else is already taken. Mindie Kniss 11, April at 3: Big Mike 11, April at 1: Name required Butch 11, April at Dave Windsor 11, April at DRF 10, April at Spirit 10, April at 9: Much of this makes good quick sense for those who need it. God bless you all. Richard 10, April at 8: Melinda 10, April at 7: Kids Party Magician in Dallas 10, April at 7: Dan 10, April at 6: MEW 10, April at 4: Sarah 10, April at 4: Hmmm 10, April at 3: Keith Townsend 10, April at 2: Jeff 10, April at 2: Realist 10, April at 1: Krista 10, April at John 10, April at 9: Romy88 10, April at 7: Mary Miller 10, April at 5: Richard 10, April at 2: Being happy, unfortunately, does not always equate to being productive or good.

Not-Caring-Anymore 10, April at 2: Patrick John Pearson 10, April at Sarah Butland 9, April at Laura 9, April at But for now just know there are incredible opportunities looking for you. Within days from now you can attract your true love…set up a business that will change the world…get a better job than what you ever imagined possible…start to reclaim your health…rediscover your confidence and connect with the bliss of your true purpose.

Accelerated learning is a choice that allows you to build all the beautiful, powerful beliefs which will get you there quickly. School left me feeling like the slug that had been sprinkled with salt. They just teach you how to be average. I hereby give you unconditional permission to be yourself and to succeed in becoming the most abundant version of yourself.

Banish guilt and feelings of self-doubt from your life and your internal world forever. I did it, and it worked like a dream. You have no more right or need to feel any more guilty than a butterfly. And like a butterfly, you are free to fly and celebrate your uniqueness today. You are ready for a life of awesome results and celebration.

But are you ready to give yourself permission to do this yet? Everyone struggles with these energies at times. For instance, even Oprah cried when she was taught that forgiveness is for your benefit and not for the other person usually her job is to make the guest experience breakthroughs and tears, not the other way round. One of the things that they never taught me at school was how people try to make you feel guilty.

I made that decision a long time ago. It was the work of a moment. They are great examples of things that can leave people feeling unfairly guilty. So how do we reframe the guilt, for example of a failed business? You simply remind yourself that of the 50 most successful business people in modern history, 49 of them had businesses go bankrupt. So if all these guys that were ultimately very successful, learned that failure like confusion is a stepping stone on the road to abundance, surely we can all learn the same lesson too?

Living in your authentic truth can never be wrong. Think about the strengths and energies that make you unique. Nobody else is me or can feel the feelings I feel. This energy is uniquely my energy.


  1. 1. The truth about spots?
  2. 57 Law of Attraction Tips For People Who Are Serious About Abundance;
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    5. You wanted to be the same as everyone else or at least, they wanted you to be the same. Breaking free and removing failure from your vocabulary allows you to follow your bliss with ease. This applies to your inner world just as much as the outside world. A better idea is to ask them how they KNOW their belief to be true. What proof do they have? Who gave them this affirmation? Do they still want to carry it around?

    Stop looking at the horizons in front of you and feeling overwhelmed. Look at the horizon behind you. And, allow yourself a small tear of pride. He spent all his time trying, did thousands of experiments, yet would always make the bulbs explode. His affirmation was that he KNEW one day he would make this freaking thing happen. Every time he ran an experiment, the lightbulb exploded.

    I want to give you countless ideas and tools that will create abundance for you. The ones that are going to awaken something in you that stirs your soul and starts making a difference right now. My dear friend and colleague Brenda, is a master of the martial art Aikido. Brenda is tiny and amazing.

    Look, when changing your internal programs to suit your source code, what you really do is you free the universe, and all of that hidden energy and power to come to your aid with any dream you choose. You ignite the law of attraction by following your true, individual path and signposts. Because YOU get to create your own truth and infinite power.

    The word imagine suggests. Live from truth every time. And work on the skill of making your truth audacious. Never live in an energy of mediocre truth. If your affirmations and declarations contain truth, they will manifest for you. The universe understands this. It will create massive wins for you. The universe knows what you love and what you hate. It knows what you believe. If you start from belief and truth any truth, no matter how small and fragile a gem it is you can manifest miracles VERY quickly.

    This is my affirmation and I see it come true every single day. So every piece of suggestion and every affirmation you say to yourself…read on a vision board…live through your energy…should contain truth. Truth can give birth to incredible manifested results. Another thing I teach clients to work with are affirmation triads past, present and future truth. They work like this:.

    Soon I am becoming happy and amazing. You see what I did there? Make loving yourself more a goal to be constantly striving for. Super-Affirmations always come true because they ARE truth. For instance, can you say to yourself, right now with genuine belief: Other people have succeeded in this endeavor and I will succeed too.

    As humans, when we declare positive feelings towards ourselves, we experience two emotions. One is very positive. A positive feeling of unconditional love, and value within ourselves. The other emotion is often some kind of self-doubt or disbelief. These two energies conflict. When they conflict, the self-doubt tends to win. Like the banker in a game of cards.

    Another way to internalize this idea. If you are constantly fuelling the fire and adding energy to the positive affirmation always including truth then the tipping point will manifest that much quicker. Throw emotion and energy into everything you do. Even negative emotions can be transmuted into positive. Did you ever see someone red in the face with anger suddenly see the humor in a situation and burst into laughter? It can be one of the most beautiful things to witness. Do everything you do with emotion and the universe will love you for it.

    The law of attraction brings a tidal wave of energy that flows through emotion. If humour and laughter are part of your source code and awaken something in you, then using this affirmation could represent an exciting breakthrough. They may take offence. Have you ever noticed how laughter can feel more true than truth? And, just as an important side note: Your subconscious is way, way more powerful than you possibly give it credit for. When you protect yourself from disappointment, loneliness, heartache and failure, you often deny yourself the thing that you want the most.

    You swap risk for unhappiness. Maybe you already know them? Well, one of the things we protect ourselves from is perceived failure. They warn them not to be too ambitious. But ironically, that attitude can cause a mountain of disappointment and missed opportunity in the long run. It can also make you freeze like a rabbit in the headlights even years later, incapable of making decisions or seizing the day. So give yourself permission to be a beautiful, tall poppy right now. The taller the better! The forces of abundance are searching for your tall poppy energy so that they can reward it.

    If you do something exciting for your future, the simulation and forecast of that future in your mind, changes in a flash. But is there a risk to going for it and trusting the laws of abundance to help you? There is no real risk to chasing your dreams. My experience with countless clients over many, many years, is that all the risk…all the frustration…and all the disappointment, is born from not chasing dreams. But please remember, there is a way to chase dreams successfully which is like chasing butterflies. Put yourself in the right energy field, and become a magnet for those butterflies.

    The more direct method of butterfly catching is so much harder. Friends and colleagues of mine who work in hospices or help people who are dying tell me the same thing again and again. I heard something very interesting recently from Mark Zuckerberg the guy who runs Facebook. This guy built a company worth billions and billions of dollars so he obviously knows a thing or two about abundance.

    It was really interesting because somebody asked him the question about how you avoid disappointments. The person asked him: How do you avoid failures and that kind of thing? The law of attraction wants you to stumble and make mistakes. It wants to lift you and be there on your journey of learning, improving and evolving. It wants to help you unravel your abundance like a flower coming into bloom after the storms have passed. Imagine if you had a party and you played chamber music and presented your guests with cucumber sandwiches.

    That way, all the right things and people will show up automatically. What you do is you take the negative person, or thing, or memory. Take my colleague Steve. He felt that his boss was having a negative effect on him. Making him feel stressed and upset. You should try this out. The mind actually takes nice things…nice people…exciting opportunities and turns them into scary things in the wardrobe.

    As a side note, this tip on its own may not transform your life overnight. There are only two things you need to get right in order to get a suggestion, affirmation or thought to manifest into reality. I used to do a lot of work helping people to stop smoking. Again, this is often subconscious and it is a flawed assumption. Turn your affirmations into questions. If you ask the correct questions, the answers show up like magic. And you can have any life you want.

    What life might you be living this time next year if you start mastering law of attraction the Ed Lester way today? Step 1 — Imagine yourself at the Olympic games standing on the winners rostrum. Hear the crowd roar. Feel the medal around your neck. See the glint of gold and the the winning flag being raised. A quick side note: This second step is key. It disassociates and makes your subconscious reach for the beautiful dream. If we spend too long associated in our goals, we just end up soaking our synapses in the kool aid and other happy chemicals, with nothing happening.

    It leads to frustration and pain and stuckness in life. Train your mind to literally reach for your goals. Eventually your subconscious will chase them like a kitten chasing a ping-pong ball on string. Ever notice how travel magazines show a beautiful destination, maybe a white sand beach and azure blue sky? And, there is always a table and empty chair. Your mind is attracted to the empty chair. It wants you to be there. Goals are the same. The law of attraction is energised by the gap between here and there. So long as it is bridgeable see tip I worked with a professional footballer once.

    He was getting very nervous about shooting goals. He kept missing even though he was very talented. I insisted that he kept watching himself on TV scoring goals and burned that image into his consciousness. Every time he had a negative thought he was to switch that picture, either on the TV or on the TV in his mind.

    And he was to surround the thought with positive emotions of love and respect for himself. I wanted him to actually have to reach in his subconscious. For a change, stand back and imagine watching these things on a TV in your mind. Your wishes and dreams need to be energized the same way a battery is energized. This is why I recommend embracing the power of the reverse paradigm shift. Once, I was running a training seminar and I suddenly noticed a woman in the group with her jaw pretty much dropped onto the table in front of her.

    And it was like a whole new world lit up inside of me. You simply need to see yourself as unique in the way a mother sees her newborn child. Love yourself just as you are and the universe will carry you on her shoulders. All affirmations and self-suggestions, in order to work really well, should be flavoured with identity— in other words, they should always reflect who you are as a person.

    Suggest you already are a wealthy person if you like. So long as it has truth to it. Many years ago when I was going through a terrible time financially, I explained to Ruth that I was a wealthy person who just happened to have no money. If you are broke or in debt, struggling financially, there is no reason for money to magnetize to you. However if deep down in your identity, you truly are a millionaire with no money you are still a magnet. Embrace the idea of crazy wisdom. Everything you do is simply an extension of who you are.

    Sometimes, the key to a breakthrough is by breaking out of the day to day trance that we all sometimes find ourselves in. To embrace crazy wisdom and make the universe deliver every one of your dreams, you must be prepared to set the rules. Any rules will do so long as they suit your style, strengths and source code. The key is to live your life playing a game in which the person who wins just happens to be the person who follows your rules.

    And that happens to be you, therefore the universe will declare YOU the winner every time. One of my favorites is Richard Branson. He has little involvement in day-to-day financial matters. He refuses to discipline or sack staff. Someone else takes care of those things. I wish the same kind of freedom for YOU… To be able to travel and live in peace…to sing your own song…to do as you damn well please….

    When I was a child I used to wake in the morning charged with this creative energy. For me it was an energy which demanded that I do something original. Something that had never been done before. I had a teacher once, Mr Fifield, who taught me that there was no such thing as an original idea. He was a nice enough guy, but we were spiritual enemies. Our source code was opposed. Then you need to take the kindness and compassion you show to the world around you and point it at yourself too. YOU can help people in the most profound of ways.

    Ways which light you up and take their breath away. Make them cry with joy and delight in the possibilities. You can also get paid royally for doing it. Also, an important note: Sometimes the kindness, compassion and respect you show yourself may need to be a little challenging. When you give yourself a much needed wake up call, the law of attraction will flow into your life effortlessly.

    Are you free to live your life in a way that suits you? Or, are you living your life trying to be what someone else taught you to be their Dharma? Take a pen and paper. Walk to a quiet spot by a lake or somewhere else tranquil. List all of these things and then commit to releasing them so that you can start to fly free as a bird.

    Can you imagine how freeing that feels? There is nothing so powerful as feeling free to be yourself and to walk your path. Always remember, no matter how lost you feel, the distance between here and your true path is millions of times smaller than paper thin interestingly this is the same for the gap between parallel universes.

    Suggestions and affirmations always work best when you repeat them, not just consciously, but also subconsciously, through your moment to moment energy. If you study the super-abundant people, you discover they are carrying around a different kind of internal program. They have chosen affirmations of a different nature. They make the rules. You can do this immediately.

    Once you decide to go on this journey, do NOT accept ordinary results for yourself. Do not accept anything less than extraordinary expectations and standards. People will try to knock you off your path. They always have been trying. The shocking thing is that sometime those you love the most are inadvertently keeping you off your path. Stick to your journey.

    Know and respect and, ideally, learn to really love yourself and your mission here. Discover who you are and your body, mind and spirit will evolve beyond anything considered ordinary. It was a posture issue. I was locking my knees then pacing around all day at training events. I was like one of those old boneshaker bikes with no suspension, traveling over the old cobbled Victorian streets.

    I was aching at the end of each day. Someone showed me how to tweak my posture very slightly and hey presto, the supposed bad back was cured instantly. Likewise, an athlete or professional dancer with one small glitch in their technique can be coached to a much higher level by identifying and improving that one small thing which is hidden from their conscious mind.

    Imagine the idea that you could be one small energy shift or belief change away from transforming your life and achieving dramatic results. The only thing is, if one of those links is weak, the whole chain breaks and your feel in disarray. Everything in your life seems to be in pieces. I believe they are all vibrant beings full of potential and magical abilities. The key is to simply find that weakest link in the chain and strengthen it. I call it mental biomechanics.

    The law of attraction is knocking on your door and you just need to figure out the small action which will open you to its full power and potential. Be open to small, regular baby steps and huge energy shifts. The two are like brother and sister. Regular baby steps and huge energy shifts are like brother and sister. Choose one thing which will make a difference and do that one thing with all the energy, emotion and belief you can muster.

    My mission in life is to help remove the energy of bullying from society. I believe when it happens, it will change everything. Bullying is simply the witch burning of our day and it must be defeated. On the other hand, it could vanish in the blink of an eyelid. Things always happen remarkably quickly once a genuine tipping point is created through critical mass. Do it quickly, immediately and without any conditions in the same way you would spring clean your home. Our parents would disappear into the pub. Us kids would all be left outside to play hide and seek. I see the same game being played out in society today.

    Greatness and abundance are searching for you. I can say this with total certainty. Sometimes we go to enormous lengths to cleverly hide our wonderful, beautiful, talented genius and strength from ourselves. But no worries, abundance will find you, the instant you leave the door open and show your true self to the universe. If there are infinite unique souls in the universe, then likewise, there are infinite secrets and ways to make the laws of abundance work.

    To ignite law of attraction to work in the real world, one thing you may need to do is to create multiple channels of how you do things. Bring everything you have, know and believe to the table and slam it there. Why rely on just one secret when you have unlimited experiences, stories, tools and help at your fingertips? Refuse to be bullied, pressurized, or dictated to by other people and the world in general. Only accept love, respect and positive energy. Any compromise on this can slow down your journey, suppress your true source code and dim your light.

    Allowing other people to dictate what you think…do…or believe is giving up your power. Freedom is always worth the journey. Stay safe, stay authentic, stay in love…. And again let me repeat. People accuse me of being a Pollyanna. A purveyor of the rose tinted spectacles. I know really bad things happen to people. My principles and teachings were all born of terrible events and sadness. You show me one inspirational autobiography of a celebrity or successful individual in history in which there is not deep hurt and suffering.

    But how we authentically understand and deal with that pain…how we translate and perceive the bad feelings…and where we take the story next. It was so sad. Eventually it was discovered he was a stowaway who had hidden under the wheels of a jumbo jet. When the wheels came out for landing, his body fell from the sky. We truly are lottery winners already.

    Be your authentic self. Follow your source code and your bliss. None but ourselves can free our minds. You know deep down, you have the power to step into a chrysalis…to metamorphosize…and to emerge as any butterfly you choose. Freedom is one simple, divine choice away from now.

    I always act as if that moment will be today. This belief shift alone has proven priceless for me and for a great many of my clients and students. An energy block simply represents a diamond hidden in a lump of dirty rock. Your blocks and bottlenecks in life are ALWAYS signposts to your next big breakthrough…to your abundance…Release your emotional and energy blocks and let the law of attraction flow through like water through a broken dam.

    You came into this world with a natural way of being you. I call it your natural swing. In my world, becoming abundant and making the law of attraction deliver BIG results is not about learning something new. One of the most valuable tips I can ever give you is to stop trying to manifest things. Manifest from a sense of being. Abundant people attract incredible things, like the ocean attracts beautiful sea birds.

    Reclaim your right to be happy, joyful and adventurous. If you let them play, they play by your rules. The law of attraction bats for the captain of the game every time. Advice for people who are not necessarily energetically designed like Donald Trump or Floyd Mayweather. Source code gets the law of attraction to work by creating a channel through your unique personality and optimal style and energy.

    Other than this document perhaps. When I first developed the Abundance Index software, I spent months of hard work…tens of thousands of dollars getting there. I emotionally bled to get it made and working. It was a great decision. Meditate through energy and not conscious thought.

    The most powerful personal development tool in the world is energy. And your personal energy is perfect for unlocking your destiny. In other words, you already have everything you need. When you learn how to harness it and get into flow…Look out world! As soon as you start looking for logical, rational answers, you risk disconnecting from source code. At the very least, be sure to balance the two. You can discover what works TODAY and get magical manifestation results quickly and without struggle. WHY it works exactly, is a different story. Let the scientists figure that one out.

    They may take years or decades.