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Find ways to understand, manage or overcome your anger. Contents of this self help guide. Strategies that you could use to overcome your anger problems.
Table of contents

Our hearts pump faster, our stomachs might churn, and we may clench our fists. These are useful early warning signs that we are getting wound up. Sometimes, it can be difficult to recognise just how much anger you are feeling, and how it is affecting you. This might be because you have lots of things going on in your life.

After getting angry about something you might start to feel guilty about it, and this can make you feel worse. When you feel angry or stressed you can try out different relaxation techniques to help you calm down, such as:. If you have a problem with someone, think about what you want to say beforehand and how you want to get your point across.

Listen to their point of view and calmly put yours across too.

If you feel your anger levels rising, walk away from a situation to calm down, rather than saying or doing something you might regret later. You can learn to manage your anger and find techniques that work for you. Try and say why you're angry, and remember that time alone to calm yourself down is okay. Take some time to think about how your actions are affecting others, and try to remember people are usually trying to help you!

You could also do some colouring, running, or any form of exercise. If you hurt yourself, apologise to yourself. Jacob says: "You could try writing it down or writing poems.

Anger Management - leondumoulin.nl

If it was someone that made you angry, tell them, or talk to someone else. Remind yourself that the emotion is valid. Talk about how you are feeling. Parents or carers and other family members, such as grandparents, may be good listeners. Your close friends and other family friends may be able to help.

How to Control Your Anger and Instantly Calm Your Mind

At school, find a teacher, mentor, counsellor or school nurse who you trust. In the community, social workers, youth workers and leaders will also be able to listen. Your GP may refer you to your child and adolescent mental health service CAMHS where you would talk to a specialist about your feelings and behaviour. The specialist may advise you how to deal with these. They may also suggest counselling if there are problems or things that happened in the past that may be causing your anger issues now. If counselling is your best option, the specialist arranges a series of confidential one-to-one sessions with a counsellor or therapist.

You can talk with them about concerns or problems you might have. The counsellor will help you work through your issues and give you skills and strategies to deal with your anger better.

If you allow anger and other negative feelings to crowd out positive feelings, you might find yourself swallowed up by your own bitterness or sense of injustice. But if you can forgive someone who angered you, you might both learn from the situation and strengthen your relationship.


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Lightening up can help diffuse tension. Use humor to help you face what's making you angry and, possibly, any unrealistic expectations you have for how things should go. Avoid sarcasm, though — it can hurt feelings and make things worse. When your temper flares, put relaxation skills to work. Practice deep-breathing exercises, imagine a relaxing scene, or repeat a calming word or phrase, such as "Take it easy.

Learning to control anger is a challenge for everyone at times. Seek help for anger issues if your anger seems out of control, causes you to do things you regret or hurts those around you.

Anger Management

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Healthy Lifestyle Adult health. Products and services. Support is also available if you're finding it hard to cope with stress, anxiety or depression. Information: If you're not sure how you feel, try our mood self-assessment. Symptoms of anger Anger can cause many different symptoms. It's not always easy to recognise when anger is the reason why you're behaving differently.

Physical symptoms faster heartbeat tense muscles clenching your fists tightness in your chest feeling hot.

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Do try to recognise when you start to feel angry so you can take steps to calm down as early as possible give yourself time to think before reacting — try counting to 10 and doing calming breathing exercises talk to people about what's making you angry — speak to someone who is not connected to the situation, such as a friend, a GP or a support group such as Samaritans exercise — activities such as running, walking, swimming and yoga can help you relax and reduce stress find out how to raise your self-esteem , including how to be more assertive consider peer support, where people use their experiences to help others.

Find out more about peer support on the Mind website listen to free mental wellbeing audio guides search and download relaxation and mindfulness apps or online community apps from the NHS apps library. Don't do not try to do everything at once; set small targets you can easily achieve do not focus on things you cannot change. Focus your time and energy on helping yourself feel better try not to tell yourself that you're alone — most people feel angry sometimes and support is available try not to use alcohol, cigarettes, gambling or drugs to relieve anger — these can all contribute to poor mental health.

Information: Further information and support The mental health charity Mind offers more information on: coping with long-term anger treatments and support available. Non-urgent advice: See a GP if:. Anger management programmes A typical anger management programme may involve 1-to-1 counselling and working in a small group.