Who Else but a Mother?

A poem for mom is short and sweet; a jumping-off point for you to personalize, or just a way to voice all the complex emotions that aren't so easy to put into words.
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I appreciate what pressures they are under and what a difficult job mothering has become. But when these mums began comparing notes about their youngsters, I felt completely excluded. They are a very broadminded crowd and I don't think they consciously left me out.


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It's just that our interests are now very different — we no longer have things in common. Eventually, I drifted away and ended up chatting with the men, who were happy to talk about things other than family life. But feeling increasingly lonely, and somehow not quite a fully fledged woman, I left early. I discovered later that I had been invited as an afterthought, when my ex-husband asked why I wasn't on the guest list.

This was hurtful, but not surprising, as I've missed out on invitations before. It's not, I believe, that my friends don't want me around any more, simply that their lives as parents, wage-earners and partners leaves them with no time for anything other than family-focused socialising, often arranged at the school gates. They bear me no ill will — I have simply dropped out of their world and their minds. When I asked my good friend Jo if she viewed me differently to her mummy friends, she admitted that, while happy to meet for dinner, she would leave me off the guest list when hosting parties.

I don't resent this state of affairs — if the boot were on the other foot I might feel the same. Funnily enough, my ex-husband, Christian, and I were the first in our group of friends to marry, aged 26, and I imagined we would be one of the first to have a baby. However, one after another of our friends announced the arrival of sons and daughters, while we lived in hope.

Doctors could find no reason for our infertility, despite lots of investigations and we were told to just keep trying. But every month the familiar ache in my belly would herald the arrival of my period, leaving me in floods of tears. Not surprisingly, this hunger for a baby put a huge strain on our marriage.

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Eventually, aged 38 and hopeful of realising my dreams of a family with someone else, I left Christian. Foolishly, I now realise, I still felt I had time.


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I was around 40 when I met David, a lovely man, divorced with a daughter. He was a wonderful father and we hoped there might be more children. Sadly, it never happened, and when David and I split, I realised I would never be a biological mother. Since accepting that I would always be child-free, I have set up a group called Gateway Women. Our aim is to support, inspire and empower women aged 35 and over who are either still living in hope of becoming mothers or coming to terms with the knowledge that they never will.

For the mom who did it all

Too often, women who are child-free by circumstance are left with the sense of not having a proper life. And many women who are childfree by choice find themselves vilified as heartless, selfish types lacking some vital quality that would make them "real" women. We women without children need to become a more cohesive bunch if we're to survive in the Mumsnet era. We want to show how much we have to offer and that we have meaning in our lives — it's just that this meaning is something other than our offspring.

Our tribe is expanding — and it's time we had a voice. Parents and parenting Relationships features. Order by newest oldest recommendations.

Mothers Day Poems That Will Make Mom Laugh and Cry | Real Simple

They have clung to me all my life. All love begins and ends there. She planted the seed that I base my life on, and that is the belief that the ability to achieve starts in your mind.

Metallica - Nothing else matter lyrics

These are the things my mom taught me. Everybody is just doing the best they can. She was the love of my life. I was lucky enough to get to have one woman who truly helped me through everything.

Sorry, but being a mother is not the most important job in the world

It is the glorious life force. Heaven knows, no one else will. We need to be strong in more ways than our children will ever know.