PDF LIFE BEFORE 25: Memory Tales Of a Friend I once Knew

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memories round which the selfishness of life is always building a thicker crust. For one thing, at that moment I was deeply grateful —that I knew my friends.
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There's a really good app called" headspace" you could use as a gentle support while you find a solution. Also talk directly to the intrusive thoughts. I was tought to do this. Address them with facts.

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Have a script where you call them out.. Go well. I very recently broke thru some barrier I've been up against for years. And Music, Exercise when I feel capable, less judgement around that now. The difference being, often set up your own support system, keep it secret from certain people, generally not recognized as a treatment lay people acknowledge as they are afraid of the unknown- though there are many signs of progress there. And someone observed recently that there was terrible stigma, fear, secrecy and avoidance of someone with cancer, the Big C, which has changed over the last years.

Been told often to take it Slowly, which varies with extent and intensity of the trauma history. And many things I have used and experienced to deal with life and coping with trauma, have quickly become clear as I begin believing what I am experiencing through my body, mind and heart. That reinforced the feeling and belief that I know how to heal, and am capable of getting out of my own way, and throwing out some ways of coping that were used to keep me silent and depressed, in order to now move more easily through the world.


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Have you tried medication for the sleep issues, particularly PTSD related nightmares? It's a beta-blocker, I tried propanolol to help with the physical manifestations of anxiety a few years ago, which was OK but not that 'noticeable', and caused some metabolism issues I was a little skeptical of how much treating nightmares could do for the rest of my sleep issues, but I've been desperate to find anything to help with my multitude of mental and physical issues.

And OMG, I can finally sleep peacefully I noticed a huge immediate change in my sleep - and I'm realising just how dysfunctional it has been my entire life. Even when I didn't remember nightmares I wouldn't sleep well, or couldn't fall asleep until am or at all and have lived in chronic fatigue. I'd wake up drenched in sweat and freezing cold, multiple times a night. I've only been on prazosin for a couple months, the difference still astounds me. I occasionally forget to take it, only remembering when I wake up, and there is a noticeable difference though my sleep is still better overall, possibly because I'm less sleep deprived the longer I'm on it I haven't noticed any side effects either, this medication is a godsend to me.

Sleep is now restful. Please talk to your doc and try it, and I hope it works as well for you. I've never met anyone with comparable sleep issues or complex PTSD, reading articles and comments by people who deal with the same issues has been such a big help. Just recently diagnosed with PTSD.

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Through therepy I've learned my mom is a narcissist. Hard pill to swallow. But at the same time atleast I'm now aware why I'm am they way I am. Past few years were getting worse but now I'm pretty stable bit not always. Thanks for sharing your story. I'm hopeful for now. God bless you guys.

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PTSD is no joke and it's so hard to trust what is going on in our own heads and if it's accurate. Anyhow I wish you all a Merry Christmas!! I had ptsd for years and suffered really bad night mares and was wakening up and wanting to self harm since starting to smoke cannibise iv never had a night mare and have never self harmed and this is because the cannibise stops you from going in to rem sleep state were ptsd night mares happen so find cannabise had saved my life I was also told by phiciatrist because iv had ptsd for so long emdr won't work on long term patients with ptsd and personality disorders.

I am so happy I found this page.

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I am in an abusive relationship, was raised with abuse, and have had terrible things happen. It kept me alive as a teenager. I healed HIM when he got sick. Looking back that was a very special moment. Back then at the time, I was just super relieved, as my parents would not pay for any vet treatment he needed. Now I realize it was the beginning of something special we all have inside! I actually have a gift, but it is in all of us. I didn't realize until in my 50's, because of my abusive life and not being to process things normally, that that healing of my horse was not normal.

He had actually healed that day. I told my parents about it and what I did to do it. I had a blanket on him to keep him warm, he was standing, I jumped on, and sat there, just loving him so much, and not knowing what to do. As a kid, we just do, not really rationalizing, but I was such a pure heart, such a sweet kid, I just started talking to him and petting his neck.


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I said please don't get sick, the other horses aren't ok again, please heal, please don't get sick. I started crying, and laid my head on his neck. He was very still as he had a fever. I said over and over, I love you, and asked god to heal him. I was raised without god, punishments for my accomplishments instead the only reason they got the horse was because all of my 3 best friends got one, so they had to for me, so I could be gone from the house every moment out of school, lol , but I asked god, and just sobbed and kept repeating I love you, and please heal.

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It was a complete letting go in the heart, and I started to see him all better, and was imaging him and I riding, jumping jumps, and running up a ' long hill as fast as I was brave enough, bareback, lol. I fell asleep. Woke up cause he started to walk around while I was on his back on his neck. He drank water, and my ride came to get me, so i left and didn't see him till the next day. Meanwhile I told the ranch owner to help him please.

They could do nothing except call the vet which my parents would not allow.


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  7. The next day when I came up to the ranch after school, he was perfect! The first one who survived! And so fast! I caught it though before he got really sick.

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    He had a fever and was lethargic, but nothing else. I explain all of this because as an abused kid, it was so exciting to see something that was going down hill, finally work out! I never put it all together until many years later. However, more here. My parents sold him and made lots of extra money because I had trained him to do more, and didn't tell me they sold him. They let my carpool pick me up, take me to the ranch, knowing we are there for hours every day. My horse had gotten out of his stall, and I went looking for him. I then asked the trainer there, and she looked at me shocked and said, "you don't know?

    I was She blew up, and then said, I am not mad at you I am furious with your parents, they sold him, and they picked him up today!