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If we're to truly love ourselves, we mustn't allow the way we look to define our personal value. It can't be our sole “calling card” for love, sex.
Table of contents

Be willing to embrace your imperfections and excuse your bad days. Allow yourself to embrace these emotions without judging yourself for them.

The Magic of Loving Yourself First

You may have to go within and seek solace in yourself to be comfortable in your own skin. Practice moments of alone time and be aware of how you treat yourself. Learn to embrace solitude and allow yourself to be mindful of your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs about yourself. The process of self-discovery can happen through the process of clinical therapy or counseling. This healing process can help you discover who you are and what your obstacles to loving yourself are.

In the alternative, periods of introspection, silent meditations, journaling, and sharing your feelings with supportive friends may help you be more aware of who you are.


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The process of loving yourself starts with understanding your true nature. It took a combination of meditation, therapy, writing , and silence to come to terms with my past and my present. Rhonda Byrne, author of The Magic , shares with us a powerful way to change all of our relationships and our life. Byrne encourages us to practice gratefulness and regularly count our blessings. She includes twenty-eight practices for twenty-eight days of your life to help you feel gratitude more deeply.

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Her initial practice is a formula to count your blessings. When you think about kindness toward others and being love to others, you open the door to divine love. I awoke and saw that life was service. I acted and behold, service was joy. Find ways to do small and large tasks to assist those living in your house, neighborhood, or community.


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Practice conscious acts of kindness and giving. Photo here. Vishnu is a writer and coach who helps people overcome breakups to rebuild their lives and live with purpose. He blogs at www. This site is not intended to provide and does not constitute medical, legal, or other professional advice. The content on Tiny Buddha is designed to support, not replace, medical or psychiatric treatment. Please seek professional care if you believe you may have a condition. Before using the site, please read our Privacy Policy and Terms of Use. Click to opt-out of Google Analytics tracking.

Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours.

8 Steps You Need To Take In Order To Love Yourself First

It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. Click here to read more. Think Web Strategy. The People Who Were to Have Loved Us I grew up in a rather patriarchal culture and family, which had trouble expressing or showing love. Be kind to yourself. Be gentle with yourself.


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    • Feel the love within you and be that love. Infuse this love with your interactions with others in your life. Give yourself a break. Embrace yourself. Are you content being alone by yourself without feelings of anxiety, fear, and judgment? Be grateful. Give yourself in service to others. A relationship will only make you shine brighter and bring more love in your life.

    The least-honored—and most powerful—path to self-love

    Below are a few suggestions for making February the month for cultivating self-love:. Love yourself note photo available from Shutterstock. Paula Durlofsky is a psychologist in private practice in Bryn Mawr, Pennsylvania. She specializes in psychoanalytic psychotherapy and treats a variety of disorders. Durlofsky has a special interest in issues affecting women throughout the lifespan.

    8 Steps You Need To Take In Order To Love Yourself First | Thought Catalog

    In addition to her practice Dr. Durlofsky is a workshop facilitator and blogger. Find help or get online counseling now. By Paula Durlofsky, PhD.

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    Work on eliminating critical and harsh self-talk. Imagining what you would say to a friend in the same situation should help with developing skills for positive self-talk.

    How I Learned To Love Myself

    Enjoy time alone Whether it be taking a walk in the park, going out for a nice meal, or seeing a great movie, learning to enjoy your own company and doing activities you enjoy when alone is crucial for cultivating self-love. For most, recognizing and appreciating our positive qualities takes effort and practice. Set aside time every day to read your list. Celebrating our accomplishments reinforces our acknowledgement and integration of our positive qualities. Give yourself permission to say no or to take the time to think about your decision before saying yes.