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Thirty years ago this month, while visiting relatives in Austria, my Viennese grandmother introduced me to Bettina, one of the many teens to whom she gave private English lessons. Bettina was six months older than I was; dark haired and impulsive. On our first date, we went to see La Cage aux Folles with German subtitles; on our second, we went skinny-dipping in the Old Danube; on our third, we smoked hash, listened to the Sex Pistols, and read Paul Celan aloud with her friends from an anarchist youth collective.

We didn't sleep together, but she taught me to open my mouth when I was kissing, and to cup her face in my hand as my tongue touched hers. After a fourth date and hours of hiking and making out in the Lainzer Tiergarten, I asked if I was her boyfriend.

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She laughed, shook her head, and decades ahead of her time, gave a short but impassioned speech about how monogamy was the enemy of true love. For the next two years, we wrote each other long letters two or three times a month. Feeling that my American education wasn't up to par, Bettina sent me reading, listening, and viewing lists in both German and English. I read and listened to everything she suggested whether I liked it or not.

I rarely reciprocated with my own offerings, fearful she'd find my own tastes Stephen King, The Police pedestrian, unimaginative and thoroughly disappointing. Rabin defined the Manic Pixie Dream Girl as a muse whose primary role is to teach and transform a young man. As contemporary a trope as it feels, it's as old as Dante with his vision of being guided through paradise by his saintly Beatrice. Bettina was my guide, and as much as my adolescent self thought it adored her, I thought less about her and more about how it was she made me feel.

Though I questioned whether I was good enough for her, and I felt lucky that she'd chosen me, I didn't question her role as change agent in my life. It was a one-sided relationship not because I was any more selfish than your average teen boy, but because I took it for granted that this brilliant young woman knew the world better than I did. As unstable as she may be, the Manic Pixie Dream Girl not only senses a young man's potential in a way he can't, she intuitively knows how to lead him to his destiny. She knows him better than he knows himself, or so he believes.

That convenient assumption allows the young man both to adore the MPDG and to avoid any responsibility for reciprocity. How can he be expected to give anything back when she has this magical intuition about the world that so vastly exceeds his own? Not long after we both started at university in our respective countries, Bettina's letters stopped coming.

Manic Pixie Dream Girl

I was in love with someone else, but I missed my exchanges with her. My notes went without reply; I only had an address; no phone number, and in the mids, of course no Internet through which to follow up. Although Gabby falls in line with the rhetoric of the first category, her observation that the definition is limited to the surface separates her from the others. Thus, she introduces a second category of writers who believe that people are meant to apply the MPDG exclusively to films; real women are not meant to apply the term to themselves. Due to the one-dimensional way in which so many women identify with this profoundly one-dimensional character, critics who exist outside the identification group criticize the term and insist that real-life identification is invalid and destructive.

Many of the women acknowledge that the MPDG exemplifies the oppression of the male gaze; yet they elaborate more on the act of being quirky. This word implies a stylized collection of idiosyncrasies that apparently encompasses panda hats, cupcake tattoos, ukuleles, etc.


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The focus on quirkiness places the MPDG in a role that satisfies the cultural gaze and eschews character analysis. Their general argument is that, because of this distortion, we should altogether eliminate the term from conversation. Despite condemnations of futility and emptiness, I found several articles and blogs that signify the depth found in the Manic Pixie Dream Girl. Because they explore mental and emotional complexity rather than only seeing the characters on the surface, they transfer the term to real life more intelligently.

Hugo Schwyzer [16] explains that, as a boy, he once focused his romantic gaze on a winsome girl who displayed no personal depth and whose elevated mood implied a magical, carefree existence. I later learned from my grandmother that Bettina had suffered from depression for years, something she never told me.

The Real-World Consequences of the Manic Pixie Dream Girl Cliché

Reflecting upon the concept helped Goodwin articulate her own struggles. She writes that the behavior she witnessed in films featuring these characters influenced the lens through which she saw her own self-worth. Pop culture never deserved an apology from Nathan Rabin, but it received one, nonetheless. An angry mob is demanding that we burn the Manic Pixie Dream Girl as a witch, because she apparently cast a spell on far too many female bloggers.

This devilish enchantment no doubt compelled them to envision the MPDG as a curse that brings condemnation upon their quirky, feminine ways. I wish that this mob would calm down long enough to acknowledge the minority who are non-flamboyantly reflecting upon the Manic Pixie Dream Girl as a way to therapeutically reflect upon their own motivations for unhealthy behavior.

When I observed this degree of thoughtfulness, I realized the value in expanding upon the psychological application.


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    • Rabin did not intend for us to apply the MPDG to real life, but since we insist upon doing so, we should reframe the problem. What would a true MPDG look like if she were to exist? I believe that we can paint a more poignant picture of a hypothetical real-life Manic Pixie Dream Girl by dissecting the term that incited all of this frenzy. By studying the other words of which the term is composed, we can determine why a true Manic Pixie Dream Girl is such a fairylike creature.

    Due to this word, the connection between the MPDG and manic-depressive mood disorder is quite evident. Abnormal euphoria accelerates mental activity in a way that drastically diverges from the cerebral lethargy experienced in depression, resulting in the fast-paced speech exhibited by Claire in Elizabethtown.

    Please Can We Let the Manic Pixie Dream Girl Trope Die?

    Although hypomania is euphoric to an unhealthy magnitude, an individual eager to escape a bleak world in favor of a colored one will desire to break apart from the less pleasant side of her identity. How would this particular mental illness contribute to a MPDG lifestyle?

    What is a 'Manic Pixie Dream Girl'?

    A young woman who suffers from bipolar disorder, in an effort to mute her depressive moods, may strive to remain in a dangerously transcendent state of mind. We see in Elizabethtown that Claire remains in a hypomanic [18] state throughout all of her interactions with the male protagonist; furthermore, she insistently initiated the relationship once she recognized his need for a savior. To forget about her own depressive tendencies, a Manic Pixie Dream Girl will pursue a man who embraces his melancholy.

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