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Table of contents

• How common is BPD?
• Personality Disorder Treatment Center
• Personality Disorder Treatment Center | Personality Disorder Rehab | The Ranch
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PubMed search for Dr. Karlsson Ronningstam E. Barn och sorg. En studie kring sorgearbete under barndomen. Stockholm, Sweden: Natur och Kultur, English title: Children and mourning. A study of bereavement in childhood. Ronningstam E, ed. Disorders of narcissism: diagnostic, clinical, and empirical implications. Ronningstam E, a cura di. I disturbi del narcisicmo: diagnosi, clinica, ricerca. Milano, Italy: Raffaello Cortina Editore, Disorders of narcissism: diagnostic, clinical, and empirical implications Japanese translation.

Tokyo, Japan: Kongo-Shuppan, Inc. Ronningstam E. When BPD is successfully treated, the other disorders often get improve, too. For example, you may successfully treat symptoms of depression and still struggle with BPD. Most mental health professionals believe that borderline personality disorder BPD is caused by a combination of inherited or internal biological factors and external environmental factors, such as traumatic experiences in childhood.

There are many complex things happening in the BPD brain, and researchers are still untangling what it all means. But in essence, if you have BPD, your brain is on high alert. Things feel more scary and stressful to you than they do to other people. After all, what can you do if your brain is different? But the truth is that you can change your brain. Every time you practice a new coping response or self-soothing technique you are creating new neural pathways. Some treatments, such as mindfulness meditation, can even grow your brain matter. And the more you practice, the stronger and more automatic these pathways will become.

How common is BPD?

With time and dedication, you can change the way you think, feel, and act. No one acts exactly the same all the time, but we do tend to interact and engage with the world in fairly consistent ways. These are elements of personality. But a personality disorder is not a character judgment.

This causes consistent problems for you in many areas of your life, such as your relationships, career, and your feelings about yourself and others.

But most importantly, these patterns can be changed! Giving yourself permission to have these feelings can take away a lot of their power. Try to simply experience your feelings without judgment or criticism. Let go of the past and the future and focus exclusively on the present moment. Mindfulness techniques can be very effective in this regard. Engaging your sense is one of the quickest and easiest ways to quickly self-soothe. You will need to experiment to find out which sensory-based stimulation works best for you. Here are some ideas to get started:. If you want to calm down, try something soothing such as hot tea or soup.

Light a candle, smell the flowers, try aromatherapy, spritz your favorite perfume, or whip up something in the kitchen that smells good.

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You may find that you respond best to strong smells, such as citrus, spices, and incense. Focus on an image that captures your attention. This can be something in your immediate environment a great view, a beautiful flower arrangement, a favorite painting or photo or something in your imagination that you visualize. Try listening to loud music, ringing a buzzer, or blowing a whistle when you need a jolt.

To calm down, turn on soothing music or listen to the soothing sounds of nature, such as wind, birds, or the ocean. This is where the impulsivity of borderline personality disorder BPD comes in. They make you feel better, even if just for a brief moment. But the long-term costs are extremely high. Regaining control of your behavior starts with learning to tolerate distress.

The ability to tolerate distress will help you press pause when you have the urge to act out. Instead of reacting to difficult emotions with self-destructive behaviors, you will learn to ride them out while remaining in control of the experience. The toolkit teaches you how to:. It will also teach you how to move from being emotionally shut down to experiencing your emotions fully. This allows you to experience the full range of positive emotions such as joy, peace, and fulfillment that are also cut off when you attempt to avoid negative feelings. The following grounding exercise is a simple, quick way to put the brakes on impulsivity, calm down, and regain control.

It can make a big difference in just a few short minutes. Feel your feet on the floor. Feel your hands in your lap. Concentrate on your breathing , taking slow, deep breaths. Breathe in slowly. Pause for a count of three.

Then slowly breathe out, once more pausing for a count of three. Continue to do this for several minutes. All you need is something to capture your focus long enough for the negative impulse to go away. Anything that draws your attention can work, but distraction is most effective when the activity is also soothing. In addition to the sensory-based strategies mentioned previously, here are some things you might try:.

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Watch TV. Do something you enjoy that keeps you busy. This could be anything: gardening, painting, playing an instrument, knitting, reading a book, playing a computer game, or doing a Sudoku or word puzzle. Throw yourself into work. You can also distract yourself with chores and errands: cleaning your house, doing yard work, going grocery shopping, grooming your pet, or doing the laundry. Get active. Vigorous exercise is a healthy way to get your adrenaline pumping and let off steam. Call a friend.

Talking to someone you trust can be a quick and highly effective way to distract yourself, feel better, and gain some perspective. Recognizing your interpersonal blind spot is the first step. When you stop blaming others, you can start taking steps to improve your relationships and your social skills.

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Instead of jumping to usually negative conclusions, consider alternative motivations. Before you act on those feelings:. Stop to consider the different possibilities. Maybe your partner is under pressure at work. There are many alternative explanations for his behavior.