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Table of contents
- How smart is your sex (tech)?
- 5 Ways to Use Butt Plugs to Take Your Sex Life to the Next Level
- “I Always Felt Weird Around Him After That”
- High-tech sex toys keep getting smarter (NSFW, seriously)
- Account Options
But there were a lot of negatives. It could feel … seedy. Where do you go for sex? I didn't feel comfortable taking someone back to my place, as he'd then know where I lived, and I live alone. If we went back to his, I'd have no idea what to expect. With "Aldgate East", we had to walk through a pub to get to the bedroom and I swear there was a train going through the lounge. You're trusting people you barely know. After a few dates with "Manchester", I agreed to visit his hotel room next time he was in London.
I'd always been diligent about practising safe sex, but he had trouble getting in the mood with the condoms and went against my wishes at the last moment. The next morning I wrote him an angry text. I've never felt so violated. Most often, though, I didn't have sex at all. I generally left home open to the possibility but found, when my date showed up, that I didn't want to see him again, let alone see him naked.
How smart is your sex (tech)?
There was no spark, or he was dull or gross or just too pushy. One date chased me to the tube trying to shove his tongue down my throat. Another — who started promisingly — changed after his second drink, spilling a glass of wine on me without apologising, and cutting me off each time I spoke. It can be harder to walk away when you've met through Tinder.
When you're matched, you can spend days — in some cases, weeks, months — exchanging messages, texting and working yourselves up, filling in the gaps with your imagination. By the time you meet, you've both invested so much, you've raised your hopes and his. In some ways Tinder can even work against you finding a partner. I met one guy who was a likely contender for a boyfriend.
5 Ways to Use Butt Plugs to Take Your Sex Life to the Next Level
We went on five dates without sex, just a kiss and a hug. Then one night, he arrived at my place stinking of booze and likely high on something. The sex was over in seconds — a massive anticlimax after such a build-up. We never saw each other again. If we'd met another way, that could have been a blip, an awkward beginning. On Tinder everything's disposable, there's always more, you move on fast. You start browsing again, he starts browsing — and you can see when anyone was last on it.
“I Always Felt Weird Around Him After That”
If five days pass with no messaging between you, it's history. At times, Tinder seemed less like fun, more like a gruelling trek across an arid desert of small talk and apathetic texting. More than once, I deleted the app, but always came back to it. Buy latex finger cots at the drugstore. They'll prevent internal skin tears and, frankly, make the whole transaction easier for you. I promise you that his slack-jawed, pinwheel-eyed, puppy-like gratitude will abate any reluctance on your part. Smell and taste can be vivid sexual lures, especially the way you smell and taste. Does he really like your signature perfume?
Might he prefer something trashier? Try bathing with a new scented oil. Walk out in a towel, then ask him to smell you and nibble and share what he thinks. Show him where. Unless you've bathed in skunk oil, his sharing will involve few words.
High-tech sex toys keep getting smarter (NSFW, seriously)
Play with flavored lubricants. There are dozens to choose from, like chocolate pudding flavor, strawberry, tangerine.
Even if you don't really need lubricants for intercourse, they're wholesomely lewd, and they increase sensation. Some men don't want flavored or scented anything. They crave the smell and taste of an aroused woman , unadorned. If you have such a man, here's a marvelous move: Find a private moment in a public place.
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Tell him you can't wait to get home 'cause you're wet just thinking about him. Maintain eye contact as you discreetly! Touch yourself. Draw your hand out and put your fingers in his mouth. Say sweetly, "See? No woman alive needs to be told that sight is every man's number one stimulus when it comes to sex. This is often the bane of our existence as when his head swivels in a restaurant like NASA radar.
But the power of sight can work for you. Forget acrylic nails, or those "darling" accessories, or that new workout gear — men couldn't care less. Take that cash and invest in lingerie. It can be demure; it can be enticingly sleazy. Practice makes perfect. And perfecting your orgasms alone will give you the confidence to relax—deux.
The first thing you have to do is banish the notion that you must have an orgasm through intercourse. Not a lot of women do, and some who say they do are lying. Most women, however, can climax with masturbation , and it's a great way to learn what really works for you. Get loose with yourself.
Make the time. Wear something hot. Try different kinds of vibrators. Try different positions: on your back, in a chair, kneeling in front of a mirror. Touch yourself in different ways — for instance, play with your labia only until the verge of orgasm, and only then touch your clitoris directly. Build sensations slowly; keep yourself near the verge for as long as you can. Discover what works best for you, and explain it to your partner. He can't read your mind. Masturbate in front of your man. Masturbate him while he watches.
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