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Accepting your spouse's honest feedback can be difficult. I know it's hard for me. I spent far more time that evening disputing her “six or seven”.
Table of contents

Beam say that maybe you feel disrespected or unloved or disliked, so explain that to me. Because if indeed he or she does feel disrespected, unloved, and disliked, you coming in and demanding that information is not going to get you the truth. And start doing some self-evaluation at this point. Beam, why is that important? Because at least hopefully it will change the way you interact with him or her.

But since I brought it up, I need to go on and finish the earlier thing. How would I know that?

You may miss the fun-loving wife you used to know.

Like, he or she got a new job. It can.

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If that happens once or twice, no big deal. I just wanna know where it went. I told you what I did with the hundred dollars. Or even, if he or she now becomes offensive to any kind of questions. However, if you see all of these things happening…. How dare you violate my privacy? How dare you not trust me? How dare you? Should I do any of those things?

There are a lot of things. You can call us and talk to one of our client representatives, who will help you know what we can do to help people. We offer everything from coaches who can coach you through things. Whatever you do, get the right help. Write your comments below [on YouTube]. Write your questions below [on YouTube].

For reconciliation to work

Anything that you would like to ask us about that we can handle, talk about, and do on future videos, or just agree or disagree on. Want more help? This free guide will teach you the 7 things you need to know when saving your marriage from an affair. Often it is the kiss of death. I hope you fare well. Often, the spouse saying it is already deeply involved with another person. Sometimes people that have been cheated on say it, not because there is someone else in their lives but because of their hurt and anger. Occasionally, there are those who say it because they simply want to be free from the misery their marriage has become.

If the one who should be fulfilling their needs for emotional closeness and being liked, loved, and respected is not doing that, people become vulnerable to having someone else fulfill those needs. The same goes with other human needs that should be fulfilled in marriage.


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Gottman reports that most affairs are about seeking friendship, support, understanding, and validation. However, I am saying that quite a few are, and that the others who say it are vulnerable to infidelity or divorce. Believe it. A much greater likelihood exists that your spouse already has drifted far from you emotionally and either consciously or unconsciously is vulnerable to developing a relationship with someone new.

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Get busy now repairing your relationship and getting back on the Love Path. If the problems are deeper and you discover that your marriage is in peril, even in early stages of peril, find the help you need to turn it around quickly. Click here to learn about our workshop that can save your marriage. Look for signs of an affair such as:. Even good people who love Jesus can do stupid things when caught up in the throes of emotion. If your spouse is involved with someone else, you can walk away if you wish.

However, if you desire saving your marriage, seek help, no matter how hopeless it may seem. For example, our success rate when working with couples in trouble is that three out of four couples stay married and make their relationship stronger if they attend my workshop. If the two of you go through three days with us, you have a great chance to save your marriage and make it good again. If not us, then find someone who can help. If you are already in a relationship with someone that you do not have a right to, we know that you will not end it as long as you can justify it in your mind through whatever rationalization you can muster.

Rationalizations are lies you tell yourself. Like all lies, the consequences are bitter. I was under pressure at work.

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So I started confiding in another female friend. And then, it went from just confiding in her, to her and I starting a relationship. It just happened over time. I continued with the two relationships for, like, a long time. My wife found out after just over a year. She left, and I continued the relationship with the person I was having the affair with.

What was going through your mind when your relationship with the other woman escalated? I felt the conflict of having someone that I can talk to, that was outside of my relationship, without causing any problems to my partner. In the beginning, it was a relief to feel that there was someone I could talk to. The pressures I was under at work were life-or-death situations.


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    5. So I sought out another relationship. Having someone to talk to about what was going on was a relief for me, without having to worry my partner with that stuff.


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    Did the person you were having an affair with know that you were in a long-term relationship? When my ex-wife found out, they had a conversation, and my ex-wife told her that the whole time, she had been in a relationship with me.

    But one evening, when I was in bed, she went through my phone and realized I had been speaking to the same number on a regular basis. She decided to call it, and told the other girl who she was. Then, that was how they both found out about the truth. We broke up. A month later she called me and told me that what I had done was a very bad thing, however, she wanted to be with me, and thought we could try and work things out.

    'He's bought our son one jumper, I've bought everything else'

    From my perspective, I just thought that because we were together for such a long time, she would overcome that insecurity. But because I spent a lot of my working life with women and a lot of my friends were female, she never got over the insecurity that I caused at the beginning of the relationship. In the beginning it was the comfort of having someone to talk to. I was worried on a daily basis that my partner would find out, or that the girl that I was seeing would find out.