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For that reason, I prioritize making things easy above pretty much all else. You want women knowing that getting to know you is a two-way street -- you'll invest.
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I am tall with long arms, and it took me a little over a year to get strong enough to do a single pull-up. But just know you might be in it for the few-month haul, at the very least. The nice thing about pull-ups as a goal, though, is they are a concrete result to shoot for, but also one that will teach you lots of good habits along the way, if you let it. So on that note, to begin with: Increasing how strong you are is a lifestyle endeavor.

You have to train somewhat smart, and you have to take care of yourself.

Psychological Strategies to Get Unstuck

By take care of yourself, I mean you need to eat, and you need to sleep and rest. Muscles are not made of nothing, and are not fueled by nothing. They need you to give them enough food and protein so they can get stronger, so be nice to them. Back to the training: A proper pull-up requires upper back strength, as well as arm strength. It is a pulling motion, so anything you can do that involves pulling any kind of row or maintaining tension in your upper back conventional deadlifts , for instance will help. Fortunately for the pull-up aspirant, full-body strength training will train all the muscles you need together, and maybe more importantly, train them to work together.

The thing that may help you the most is doing modified versions of real pull-ups. This applies for all movements: Doing squats for sets of 10 at a relatively lighter weight will help me do sets of five at a heavier weight, which will help me do a single squat at a much heavier weight.


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If there is something I can do that is like a pull-up, but slightly less hard, that I can do more reps of, I should train that movement because doing so allows me to get better at pull-ups without actually having to do something as hard as pull-ups. In other words, doing some kind of assisted pull-up—and lots of them—will go a long way to helping you eventually get strict, unassisted pull-ups. But not any kind of assistance will do. There were two training methods that worked best for me when I was training to get a pull-up. The first was using super-bands giant rubber bands looped around my feet on one end and to the pull-up bar on the other.

With this setup, the band will bear some of my weight while still allowing a full range of motion, which let me do more pull-ups at a time. For instance, if I could only do a second negative once, I might do three sets of four five-second negatives. And then I was done!

When you're having a conversation with her, ask questions about her opinions on important issues, such as what she wants to do in the future, rather than just talking about bands and school. You also need to show you're interested in getting to know her by opening up and talking about your own feelings and goals. If she asks you questions, be yourself instead of trying to impress her by acting cooler or smarter.

Know Your Target Heart Rates for Exercise, Losing Weight and Health

If you want to learn more, like how to find something you have in common or get to know her family, keep reading the article! To create this article, 24 people, some anonymous, worked to edit and improve it over time. Categories: Social Interactions for Youth. Log in Facebook Loading Google Loading Civic Loading No account yet?

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Edit this Article. We use cookies to make wikiHow great. By using our site, you agree to our cookie policy. Article Edit. Learn why people trust wikiHow. Learn more Have lots of short conversations first. Aim for many quick conversations instead of one long one, at first. If you want to be flirtatious and get a girl interested in getting to know you back, try to talk to her regularly. Talk in the hall during passing period at school. Exchange a few quick sentences, then say, "Talk to you later.

This will help to ensure that you're thinking about her, and you'll both be thinking about each other. Listen when she speaks. One of the best ways to get a girl to open up more to you is to be a good listener. Focus on being a good listener. Show that you're interested in what she has to say. Don't dominate the conversation. Ask a question instead of launching into a story.

Step 2: Build your pipeline of women

Look at her while she talks and nod your head to show that you're paying attention. After she finishes, summarize what she said and use her name while you talk. This helps to show that you're giving her your personal attention. Make eye contact. Eye contact is very important in establishing a good conversation. If you want to get to know a girl better, practice making better eye contact while you're speaking and while she's speaking.

If you struggle to keep eye contact, or it makes you feel awkward, then practice. When you watch TV, practice holding the gaze of the TV actors as long as possible, or practice picking a spot on the face near the eyes, like the nose, the eyebrow, or another spot to hold your gaze. Smile to put her at ease. If you want someone to open up to you, put them at ease by smiling. Even if you're feeling nervous, or feeling serious, or feeling the serious feelings about this girl, you need to relax yourself and relax her by flashing those pearly whites.

Make your flirty talking face a smile. Even if you don't want to get to know this girl better romantically, it's still good to establish that you like talking to her and you enjoy her presence.

6 simple steps to keep your mind sharp at any age - Harvard Health

A smile goes a long way in doing just that. Read her body language. It's important to make sure you're not bugging someone by approaching them and asking questions. Make sure that your presence is ok by learning to read a girl's body language. If she's not into talking, she'll display some of the following body language, which means you should just end the conversation and leave her alone: Crossed arms Frowning Looking down and avoiding eye contact A furrowed brow or confused face Turning away from you Very brief answers to questions. If you're nervous every time you strike up a conversation with a girl, learn to calm yourself down in the moment.

Be as natural as possible. Keep it simple and straightforward by keeping the conversation short. Lots of times, you'll be nervous because you think you won't have anything to talk about, or you'll say something dumb. We'll cover that in the next section. Part 1 Quiz If a girl is uncomfortable with your presence, she may Cross her arms. Look down instead of at you. Give very brief answers to your questions. Any of the above. Ask questions instead of talking about yourself.

Lots of people, especially guys, talk too much about themselves in conversation. If you tend to do that when you're nervous, try to switch tactics.


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  • Instead, ask more questions and keep her talking about herself. This helps to take the pressure off of you and lets you learn a bit more about her. Make your questions complication and probing, but relatively light. It's always good to ask, "What did you think of that test in chemistry? Did you feel good about it?


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    Use open-ended questions. If you ask, "How are you today? Ask a specific question that will take some time to answer: "How's soccer going this year?