Manual The Squabble at the Dinner Table

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Nov 21, - It's common wisdom that families should avoid talking about politics around the Thanksgiving table. And coming up on election year — with polls and gaffes every day — won't it be hard to talk about Car Talk the whole night? So we turned to Miss Manners, aka writer Judith Martin, to.
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Even though you may have spent hours prepping dishes and picking out the right wine , remember that these gatherings should be more about social connections and good conversations, not the food on the table — although a delicious meal always improves the table conversation.

The Dinner Table

If, like me, you suffer from a people-pleaser personality, practice saying "no" in a variety of polite ways. If a simple "No, thank you" doesn't cut it, try "I'm too full right now, but maybe later!


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Of course, though it probably goes without saying, don't take home food unless you actually plan to eat it. Carrie Dennett, a registered dietitian nutritionist, writes in The Seattle Times , "To deflect food pushers without stepping on toes, I also like the strategy of starting with a compliment and finishing with a deflection. If someone is pushy and won't take no for an answer? Dennett warns against using the "D" word as an excuse — that is, diet.

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They may push even harder with lines like, 'Come on, you have to enjoy yourself sometimes. Another social faux pas to avoid? Making up a food allergy just to get out of eating a certain dish. That's a fib that will certainly come back to haunt you.

'Tis the season for setting your food boundaries

This continued as I changed jobs and gained promotions, most summers going to far flung places, much to the puzzlement of my managers, friends and everyone else. Girlfriends didn't understand it either, so they came and went. In my early thirties, I decided that backpacking was not for me anymore and took an organised tour.

That had me hooked and I dreamed that if I could ever have the balls to quit the well paid job, I would want to be a tour leader.

By , I was being offered a voluntary redundancy in a re-structuring. It wasn't long before the application form was on its way and in I became a tour leader in China. Mark Jackson.


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China is an amazing country, a place that needs time and complete immersion to be able to understand. I took a job as a tour leader and instantly I was out of my depth. I experienced places and situations that I could never have been prepared for and all with a group of paying tourists who were looking to me for guidance.

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However, it was not long before I saw that the people who had saved up for their holiday of a life time were far less prepared than I was. Over the first season I visited many parts of the vast country, sampling the culture and learning much about what China is.