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Whether you've gone away to college, moved to a new city or even just traveled for vacation, homesickness is a common emotional experience.
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- HOMESICKNESS, Counselling Cell, Indian Institute of Technology Roorkee
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Skip to content. Sign in My Account Subscribe. The Atlantic Crossword. The Print Edition. Latest Issue Past Issues. Rainesford Stauffer is a writer based in New York. Connect Twitter. But don't be upset with yourself.
HOMESICKNESS, Counselling Cell, Indian Institute of Technology Roorkee
A lot of people get homesick, even grown-ups. When you're in a new place, it can take some getting used to. How will you fall asleep at your friend's house without your night-light and the sound of your mom watching TV in the next room? Are you ready for the good news?
You can help yourself feel less homesick. Here's how:. If you're going away from home, bring your pillow or your favorite pajamas. You also can bring pictures of the people you'll be apart from and look at them any time you want.
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The more fun stuff you do, the less time you'll have to feel homesick. Try to join in activities wherever you are. If you're at camp, sign up for that kayak race and be sure to go to the Friday night dance. At a sleepover, play the games and do all the crazy dances!
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Even if you're not completely into it at first, you might soon start to have a good time. This one is tricky because if you spend all your time on the phone with your parents, you won't have time for any sleepover fun. But you can make a plan for when you'll call your mom or dad.
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- Dancing in the Dark: Killing Time?
For an overnight visit, maybe you can call once that night and again in the morning when you're ready to be picked up. With camp, you might set a regular day and time for a phone call home.
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The more you get used to being away from home, the better you are at coping. You inoculate yourself. Allowing yourself to feel a little sad is a necessary part of moving forward. When I was homesick, I had a bad habit of idealizing my old life, forgetting about all the annoying little things that came with it. Not in my head, though—not while I was idealizing the past. The grass is always greener on the other side of the country.
Research shows nostalgia can actually improve your idea of the future and make you happier.
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You just have to know how to harness in a way that it becomes productive instead of destructive. Are you dwelling on the past or are you focusing on how it can help your future? People who see each good experience as permanently enriching are more likely to get a mood boost.
But a person who mainly focuses on the contrast between past and present damns every good experience with the attitude that nothing in the future can ever live up to it To avoid dwelling on this contrast, [Psychologist Fred Bryant] recommends connecting the past with the present. As you think about your current job or family, for example, recalling your younger self who once dreamt of this future can enhance your outlook on the life you have now. In short, nostalgia can be a pain, or it can make things better.
That usually means making the new place your own. Aside from just meeting new people and giving it time, one simple way to do this is to build your own new traditions. A tradition can be as simple as going to the grocery store every Sunday morning or weekday evening , if you want to beat the crowds.